Global Dating Part 2: She Said

The “she said” story begins with the array of circumstances preceding my trip to San Francisco in January (2013). The year 2012 was rough, but beautiful as I saw the Lord’s faithfulness displayed through some intense physical and emotional journeys. In pursuit of fresh escapades and with a passion to experience the truths I believed intellectually, I set out for my favorite city. It was crazy to be sure, but I couldn’t silence the unexplainable desire I had to go and adventure with Jesus. And adventure I did!

sailing in the SF BayThe four weeks I spent in San Francisco were a time of healing, of beauty, of repose. It was priceless. Jesus met His little princess there in the heart of San Francisco. He whispered His love to me again and again until its reality seeped deep into my very being. He provided for me. He sent dear friends to me to share more of His goodness. One of those friends was Joey.

And in case you suspect I was swept off my feet during that trip, allow me to set the record straight. No one did any falling (or catching). Joey and I did, however, have a surprisingly great time reconnecting and reminiscing about days gone by. In hindsight, the first day we hung out couldn’t have been a more perfect date. But we weren’t dating and I was quite persuaded we were nothing more than good friends.

Borel Hill

The San Francisco chapter in the story of my travels ended all too quickly. Then began the emails. More emails. And longer emails. And then another visit. This time Joey was in Atlanta for a mutual friend’s wedding. I was emphatically prepared to give the “we’re just friends” speech since I had suspicions that Joey was more interested than I was. But in an unexpected turn of events, lunch segued to coffee and I found myself lost in conversation with Joey. Somewhere between the drive rehearsing my speech and the end of the 3- or 4-hour chat I had trashed the “just friends” illusion and decided if Joey ever asked me out on a date, I would say yes.

Several weeks later Joey texted to say he would be in Atlanta over the 4th of July and if possible to “keep your schedule open.” What in the world?! I admit, I stressed over my response. Should I be sassy? Play hard to get? What if he was only coming to see family?

Surprised

My questions were put to rest a couple weeks later when Joey called and officially asked me out on a date. But he didn’t just ask for one date, he asked for the entire weekend! I was surprised and delighted. The weekend plan was impressive. And I had no idea the half of what was in store those next couple of days. Magnificent waterfalls, coffee, wonders of the sea, a family birthday event, a movie night, and a candlelight dinner (cooked by Joey himself) were all part of the whirlwind. It was a month’s worth of dates squished into 4 awesome days.

This time he did sweep me off my feet.

piedmont park

The adventures and stories continue as Joey and I date across the U.S. We are increasingly grateful for technology when we’re apart and savor every moment we get to spend together in the same time zone and in the same city. Long-distance challenges are real, but facing them together makes it worthwhile.

In the words of Agnes from Despicable Me 2, “I’M SO HAPPY!!!!”

minion party love

Global Dating Part 1: He Said

I know many friends have wanted to hear more of the story behind my recent change in relationship status. And before you mark this post as spam, I’ll try to keep a balance between “just the facts” and “pass the Pepto”.

[This is a guest post by my awesome boyfriend, Joey Tyson.]

Joey and Laura

Laura and I are actually childhood friends. When I was 12, not long after moving to Atlanta, my family joined the church that her family already attended. Apart from teaming up once in an outdoor game whose rules I no longer recall, we weren’t particularly close growing up. But we reconnected while I was in grad school, and eventually found several shared perspectives and interests. By that time, I had moved to Virginia and Laura was still in Georgia. As our lives seemed to go in different directions, we lost touch for a while.

That changed earlier this year. Laura enjoys traveling, and since her current job allows her to work remotely, she decided to spend a few weeks exploring the San Francisco area while deepening her relationship with God. Fortunately for me, I had moved to northern California the year prior after taking a job with Facebook. The more time we spent time together, the more I began to realize how much we truly had in common.

After Laura returned home, we continued sharing thoughts on a range of topics via email. And through these conversations, we discovered that even our deepest values seemed to echo the same song. Our friendship continued to grow as we talked more often, including an afternoon in-person when I visited Atlanta.

The weekend after July 4th, I visited Atlanta once more, but not before asking Laura if I could take her out on a date. She not only said yes, but agreed to join me on a series of adventures while I was in town, from hiking Amicalola Falls to seeing the Georgia Aquarium to enjoying a fancy homemade dinner (although that last one was a surprise). We both had a wonderful time and endeavored to move forward with a long-distance relationship.

IMG_5736We knew that path wouldn’t be easy, but we’ve been learning to navigate it and are still very happy to be together even while we’re geographically apart. I’m continually amazed by Laura’s kindness and character; her friendship amplifies God’s goodness and joy in ways I never imagined.

We greatly appreciate the myriad encouragements we’ve received from friends and look forward to seeing what awaits us in the next few chapters of this story. 

IMG_5732

Adventures in San Francisco

I recently spent 4 epic weeks in the beautiful bay area of San Francisco. The adventures, memories with friends, lessons learned, and breathtaking scenery will soon be put into words (probably a series of blog posts). But until then, here are a couple pictures to give you a sneak peek. 🙂

Cliff house

Cliff House, Ocean Beach

Golden gate from ft mason

Golden Gate Bridge from Fort Mason

Muir Woods

Muir Woods

Philz CoffeeBest drip coffee. Ever. (aka Philz Coffee)

Bodin

Boudin San Francisco Sourdough

danger trail closed

Trail to Vernal Falls, Yosemite National Park

from 36,000 ft

From 36,000 feet. I seriously ❤ mountains. Especially snow capped mountains.

Pier 1

Pier 1 / Financial District, San Francisco

When God is Silent

Earnest, desperate prayers have been brought before the throne of grace.

Yet God remains silent.

We double and triple check our motives and our requests.

Yet God remains silent.

In our feebleness we persist asking, seeking, knocking.

Yet God remains silent.

We question if God heard. We confess every known sin.

Yet God remains silent.

Could there be something more? Something bigger than we can imagine?

In response to this perplexing dilemma, I would like to share a couple excerpts from a tremendous book by Oswald Chambers titled “If You Will Ask.” The thoughts are based John 11:5-6 when Jesus waited until Lazarus was dead to visit. “Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus. So, when He had heard therefore that he was sick, He stayed two more days in the same place where He was.”

“God’s silences are His answers. If we only take as answers those that are visible to our senses, we are in a very elementary condition of grace. Can it be said of us that Jesus so loved us that He stayed where He was because He knew we had a capacity to stand a bigger revelation? Has God trusted us with a silence, a silence that is absolutely big with meaning? That is His answer. The manifestation will come in a way beyond our comprehension…

“That is what prayer means – not that God may bless us. As long as we have the idea only that God will bless us in answer to prayer, He will do it, but He will never give us the grace of a silence. If He is taking us into the understanding that prayer is for the glorifying of His Father, He will give us the first sign of His intimacy – silence. The Devil calls it unanswered prayer. In the case of Martha and Mary, the Spirit of God called it a sign that He loved them, and because He loved them and knew they were fit to receive a bigger revelation than ever they dreamed of, He stayed where He was. God will give us the blessings we want if we won’t go any further, but His silence is the sign that He is bringing us into this marvelous understanding of Himself.”

Is this the case with you? Is God trusting you with silence? Then take heart, my friend! You have not been forgotten, rather, our Father is inviting you to experience Himself in a deeper, fuller way. Embrace God’s silence.

Go adventure.

Life happens fast. Whether categorized by survival, maintenance, or sheer delight, time escapes without return. Seize every moment. Stop postponing your “someday” plans because someday is never guaranteed. We have today, this moment. What about the vacation to Santorini, Greece you’ve been dreaming about?  Or the dance lessons you always wanted to take? The Tough Mudder you purposed to conquer? The friend you promised to meet for coffee? The course you wished you could take? Buy the airfare and block your calendar at work. Sign up for a dance lesson. Create a Tough Mudder team. Call your friend. Enroll in the course and secure your books.

tough mudder

Be intentional about your life. Start living this moment to the fullest instead of fantasizing of an alternate life in a world of somedays. Break your comfortable norm and take a risk. Go adventure.

What risk will you take today to start living your someday dreams?

Confessions of a Planaholic

Once upon a time, there was a little girl who loved to plan. It began harmless enough as she inquired about plans for school, lunch, and playtime. But this desire to know what was happening, when, and why, steadily morphed into what some might classify as an obsession. Instead of a series of moments lived, life became a ferris wheel of calculated plans and regimented actions.

Perhaps you can relate. Is your life a scripted sequence of events with the vague promise of security and success? Or is it a mathematical equation where event[a] added to event[b] equals presumed happiness? Sadly, this was my life.

Through several job changes, a mission trip, a severe extended illness, and unrealized ambitions, God engineered my circumstances to obliterate my carefully crafted plans. Without a doubt it was an excruciating process. I was a control freak and I didn’t want to admit it. The only guaranteed path to success that I knew was snatched away and I was no longer in control. In hindsight, it seems evident that one of God’s divine purposes in this upheaval of my life was to teach me to trust Him.

Trust, not just a passing thought or a clever cliché, but real trust in a real God through real situations. Each event was like Jesus asking me, “Will you trust Me now?” I am ashamed to say, too often trust was my last recourse. As a natural-born planner, I had Plan A, B, C, D, and E readily available. Trust was Plan Z. Having exhausted my plans and finding myself in a state of desperation, I collapsed in the Lord’s ever-present arms. I discovered that all the while He was ready and willing to prove His faithfulness to me. He was simply waiting for me to wait on Him. To trust Him fully. To rest in His supremacy. To relinquish my plans in exchange for His perfect plans.

Trusting God is scary. Not because God is in any way inept or insufficient, but because the path is unknown to us. According to common sense, the unexpected is risky. But, this is not true when the unexpected comes from our omniscient God. “Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God.” (Corrie Ten Boom) Trust is a daily, intentional act that requires courage. Although it still freaks me out to surrender my plans, I’m learning that Jesus is always trustworthy. Only through trusting Him can I find the authentic peace and security I crave.

 

The words to this old hymn by Frances Ridley Havergal say it best:

 

Every joy or trial falleth from above

Traced upon our dial by the Sun of Love.

We may trust Him fully, all for us to do:

They who trust Him wholly, find Him wholly true.

Stayed upon Jehovah, hearts are fully blest

Finding as He promised, perfect peace and rest.

Tribes, Dreams, and Love

The Cinderella fairytale is leaving countless unsuspecting would-be-princesses disillusioned and disappointed. Prince Charming is MIA, or rather, has been abducted by eternal adolescence. The princess must grow up.

broken heart

What went wrong? And what can be done about it?

So much has already been said about this awkward turn in relationships (or lack thereof). Many writers have chided men who are still boys. But what has been said to the girls? Are they helpless victims? Absolutely not!

___________________________

This is my passion and my tribe: the disillusioned princess who wants to believe in true love, but has lost her life- her dreams, her passions, who she really is- in the pursuit of the Cinderella fairytale.

So there you have it. 🙂